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Affichage des articles dont le libellé est Resolutions. Afficher tous les articles
Affichage des articles dont le libellé est Resolutions. Afficher tous les articles

samedi 6 octobre 2012

Breaking resolutions...

As detailed in a previous entry I had promised myself that 2012 would bring only liaisons with hot, sexy Frenchmen. There was to be no more Anglo boys entering my life..or bed...or vagina...you get the idea.

That resolution lasted about a month.

The night that I met Charles I had consumed 3 bottles of rosé wine with a friend. And of course, because I still haven't learnt my lesson about drinking on an empty stomach (even though I'm now in my mid-twenties) I was well on my way to being on the wrong side of merry.  Note to self: "Eating's cheating" was fine at age 20, now, it's just a downright stupid philosophy.

After the aforementioned wine I was far too drunk to care that I found myself in an Anglo bar. Yes, my snobby attitude had disappeared and, according to the pictures that I found on my phone the next day, I had had a great time talking to my fellow boozers in some tiny pub in the Marais whose name now deserts me. My memories are hazy but I remember one such fellow boozer as being a hot English guy in a suit who I had a drunken kiss with right in the middle of this tiny pub. Classy! The next thing I remember is him giving me  his name (Charles) and number on a piece of paper before he made a hasty exit.

After I had gotten over my hangover the next day I text Charles. His quick exit had left me wanting more and from what I remembered he was very attractive. We text back and forth for a few days, I was loving the British humor and so was very quick to agree to a date with him that weekend. He told me that he was relatively new to Paris so I suggested that we went to Chez Justine, one of my favourite restaurants ever! So on the Friday I got home, got myself dolled up and headed to the 11émé.

When I came out the metro station and met Charles I silently cursed my beer goggles. Charles wasn't bad looking but he was ever so slightly shorter than me (eek!) and was very baby faced. Even though I like my men tall I overlooked it, after all he had made the effort of wearing a suit and we were going to my favourite restaurant, things could have been a lot worse. As we walked towards the restaurant Charles asked me how my day had been. I told him about my day at work and mentioned how I had went to the gym after. That was when strike one happened. Charles actually stunned me into silence by actually saying out loud "Yeah, I really need to join a gym. At the moment I look like a Holocaust victim when I'm naked." Seriously, who says things like that?! Especially when on a FIRST DATE!!! Thankfully it was dark so I doubt he saw the look on my face. I told myself that perhaps he was just nervous and decided that I would ignore his faux pas.

Once seated inside the restaurant however, things went from bad to worse. In passing I mentioned that he had also been in a suit the last time I had met him when strike two happened. Charles informed me that he did not own a single pair of jeans and that he wore suits every single day, not for work, just because he wanted to. Not only did he wear suits but he often accompanied them with a fedora hat. BOOM! This was closely followed up by him talking about how much he just loved smoking. I try not to judge people on how they dress and if people want to smoke it's their choice but living your life like you are on the set of Mad Men is a little deluded. Predictably he also loved the music of Frank Sinatra and Dean Martin and scoffed when I told him that I like a little of everything,  aaaaand strike three!!!!

Over our (delicious!) meal the topic of age came up. Charles had implied to me that he had a very good job and so, the topics of education and work came up. Something wasn't quite adding up though until he admitted that he was a mere twenty years old and that his birthday had been one month before! His very good job was an internship! Strike four! Charles cheerfully asked me if this was a problem and even though I said no, there was no hiding the expression on my face. Now, I know, I know, 'age is only a number', blah, blah, blah but take that 5 year age gap and add a big dose of immaturity and then it becomes very relevant. The very final straw came however when Charles asked me what year I had graduated. When I told him 2008 he actually laughed and declared "Oh wow, that's the year I started!". BOOM, BOOM, BOOM!!!! Strike five! Thankfully he lived in the suburbs of Paris and had to catch the RER home (explanation for his quick exit the night we had met) so there was no time for post-dinner drinks. Very sweetly, he did try to pay for my meal but there was no way I could let that happen, he was practically still a child in my eyes!

As we said goodbye I silently praised the 'bisous' for giving me a polite goodbye without that awkward kiss avoidance. We exchanged a few more texts before I (truthfully) told Charles I didn't think we had much in common. My foray back into the world of Anglo boys had been a disaster. From now on I would stick to Frenchmen. 










samedi 10 mars 2012

New Year 2011, New Resolutions....New Adventures!!!

As 2010 drew to an end I was delighted to be waving goodbye to a totally crap year. I was determined to make  2011 a good one though and I was well on my way: my heart had gone from broken into tiny pieces to only slightly fractured, work was going well and I had fantastic friends. Aaaand to top it all off I had been invited to a New Years party in a large suburban apartment that promised to be full of hot Frenchmen! Tim, who invited me, is a friend who had studied at my university for a semester and we got back in contact again after I moved to Paris. Although he is a very very fine specimen of a man there has never ever been anything between us but friendship...but that didn't mean that I couldn't engage in a little more than friendship with one of his nice, handsome friends that I knew would be at the party. As I got ready (what to wear?!) I pondered my New Years resolutions:


  • NO MORE BRITISH BOYS!!!! - I was in the land of les frogs and the most beautiful men in the world. The time had come to take advantage of that. Lets never go back to boring old burgers when surrounded by amazing steak!!!
  • GO TO THE GYM 3-4 TIMES PER WEEK - Don't we all make this resolution at some point in our lives? I actually (for the most part) managed to keep this resolution even though I tend to go 2-3 times these days rather than 3-4.
  • CUT OUT CHEESE - This was never going to happen! My vices in life? Cheese, shopping and Frenchmen. None are all that good for the body, mind or wallet but are perfect for short-term happiness.
  • CUT DOWN TO ONE BOTTLE OF WINE PER WEEK - Again, never.going.to.happen!
  • START A BLOG  - Enough said.
So off I ventured to the party with a bottle of champagne in one hand and various alcohol/petite fours in the other. I was a little early and when I arrived I was greeted by several familiar faces including Oli. Oli was a guy that I had only met a couple of times before. The first time I had ever met him I garbled away in Franglais for about 10minutes before I gave up and asked 'Do you speak English?' only for him to answer 'Yes' in the clearest, most perfect Americanized accent I had ever heard on a Frenchman. Oli was very attractive guy but he totally knew it and was just that little bit too arrogant for my liking.  Also present was 'D' who, like Tim, had studied at my university for a semester. We had once shared a very drunken kiss or 3 and had never been allowed to forget it.

Soon the party was in full swing. I tried not to show too much delight at the fact that out of around 30 of us there were 4 girls (myself included) and the other girls all had boyfriends. I drank champagne, ate escargots, danced and flirted lots with the many handsome  men present. After midnight things did not die down and I was very very drunk. I made a trip to the bathroom (once you pop, you cant stop right?!?!) and upon exiting I was accosted by Oli who had been waiting outside. The next thing I knew he was kissing me and walking me towards one of the bedrooms. This was a guy who knew what he wanted and would use all his charm to get it...but as I said, although he is very handsome I just wasn't that into him. After some slight groping where he tried his best to get into my pants I used the old safety-net question of  'Do you have a condom?'. He didn't but unlike all my other Frenchman encounters he didn't see it as a problem and tried his best to convince me to have sex with him without one. Studying in the US had obviously taught that guy some bad habits! 

As we continued this horizontal dance (with clothes on) of him trying to have his wicked way and me (mostly) rejecting his advances one of the other guys from the party burst into the room waving Olis phone about. One the phone was someone who he called 'baby' and who was told that he had been sleeping. Yep, of course this guy had a girlfriend.  I thanked my lucky stars for my near miss and rolled over and went to sleep. In the morning I left Oli the cad sleeping in bed while I went to join everyone else in the cleanup process. I had to ward off a million questions and laughter about what had happened but I was too hungover to care.

The party was a success. Yes, Oli was a bit of a bastard but I still had an amazing night and later that day I was happier than ever that nothing had happened between Oli and I us due to to a very unexpected text message....

Until next time!